Much talk this past week – post royal wedding – of things Britain does well.

Not much, is the answer.

We do pageantry and formal occasions well, certainly, we make a good sausage, fantastic crisps, and still – despite dumbing down – print great newspapers.

Then again, the Chinese can put on an even better do, the Germans make better sausage, Ireland makes the best cheese and onion crisps, and the Sunday New York Times is stil the standard bearer of thick newspapers.

But – as any parent will tell you – there is one thing Britain does better than anyone else in the world: children’s television.

From Rainbow to The Flumps, Teletubbies to Big Cook Little Cook, the BBC (and others) have a seriously good track record in the kids’ TV department. Selling these programmes abroad makes the BBC a fortune.

What happens when these programmes get abroad is another question.

In the recent past they were often shown as was. Now, however, they are more than likely to be dubbed into the local language. This is a pity.

An entire generation of Romanians – who grew up in that immediate post-revolution period when cable TV had infiltrated Romania but the desire to dub everything had not – speaks outstanding English in large part thanks to hours of watching kids TV – be it English or American – in the original language.

Things have changed a little now.

Though there are more children’s channels than ever (our kids can choose from Baby TV, Boomerang, Cartoon Network, Disney, Minimax and Nick) they are all broadcast dubbed into Romanian by what appears to be a limited crop of actors. This can often lead to comical goings on, with the voice of Mickey Mouse suddenly appearing as the voice of Hannah Montana‘s latest love interest.

If – like us – you are lucky to have Dolce, some (but not all) channels offer sound in the original language. Standard cable TV does not. (We also – thanks to the joys of a Proxy Server – have access to the BBC iPlayer).

Now, before you scream ‘Little Englander’ the call for an end to the dubbing of English-language kids’ TV into Romanian is in fact being led by Romanian parents and teachers.

At the cinema in Romania, while films are generally shown in the original language, animated films aimed at children are usually available (in the multiplexes at least) dubbed or subtitled. Parents can then decide which version they take the kids to see. A perfectly sensible compromise.

So it’s disconcerting that PSD MP Victor Socaciu has submitted an amendment to the broadcasting law which would require all foreign programmes broadcast on Romanian TV to be dubbed into Romanian instead of subtitled.

Socaciu claims the measure is designed ‘to protect national identity,’ adding that ‘the message of a film can be more easily understood by the audience if it is dubbed.’

Socaciu clearly knows bugger all about cinema.

Meantime, dub this:

Number one son was seven yesterday, so as part of his birthday celebrations we took him to the cinema to see Ice Age 3, in 3D. Not the greatest film ever made (not even the greatest Ice Age film ever made) but as the target audience is seven year olds, not thirtysomethings, who are we to judge?

The bizarre thing was though, the cinema was packed with adults who had no apparent kids in tow. Sitting next to us was a couple who we imagine to be in their forties, sitting there in 3D glasses watching a kids film. With no kids. Unfathomable.

Anyway, we digress. The point of today’s rant is to explain for the uninitiated what going to the cinema in Bucharest means.

As we’re English, we chose the subtitled version of the film, so that we could enjoy the original soundtrack. And here is the biggest problem with the cinema in Romania. As Romanians do not need to hear what’s being said, they see no problem in talking the whole time. To them this is not rude or obnoxious (indeed, go to a dubbed version of an animated film and there will be virtual silence), they simply feel that as they do not need to hear anything they can chat away. And fair enough.

To us however silence in a cinema is golden – whatever the language of the film – but then I guess we have had a different upbringing.

The second problem is of course the universal mobile phone issue. A number of cinemas in France recently installed equipment that blocks mobile phone signals inside the cinema. Would that it be possible here, or in England, or anywhere people still insist on not turning their mobile phones off for an hour and a bit. Nobody is that important that they cannot survive 90 minutes without making or receiving a phone call, most of which are pointless anyway.

Yesterday, one girl in the row behind called a friend who was clearly still in the popcorn queue to say ‘sa nu uiti sa-ti iei ochelarii de 3D la intrare in sala.’

Anyway, final word goes to number one son who on the way out said ‘that was great. When it comes out on DVD can you download it from the internet for me?’