We are not huge fans of 3D films. We know they are all the rage, but we can’t help thinking that they are just a bit of a waste of time. By making a film in 3D you are basically admitting that the film is not good enough to carry its audience on its merits alone. Only kids films have any kind of excuse to use 3D, as the effects help keep kids happy for long enough to get to the end of the film.
It cannot be a coincidence that great directors do not make use of 3D.
Anyway, hot on the heels of pointless 3D films has been the pointless 3D newspaper. Now available in Romania.
We have never bought any Romanian newspapers on anything like a regular basis, mainly because they are not very good.
Romanian sports newspapers are therefore not particularly good newspapers* reporting on not particularly good football: not a winning combination in our book. Indeed, much of the time they usually appear to be far more interested in which footballer’s girlfriend has the biggest tits than which team is top of the league.
*To be fair, one, Gazeta Sporturilor, is considerably less down at heel than the other, and increasingly less obsessed with breast-size.
But this week we have had our father-in-law in town. He’s a top bloke who we get on with very well, not least because when he visits he does all of those handy-man jobs around the house we are incapable of doing. (So that’s all of them then).
He also still takes a lively interest in Romanian football. He has yet to realise that Romanian football is rubbish, and so actually watches matches without a hint of irony.
(For the record, we should state here that we used to watch a great deal of Romanian football. Many moons ago we even had a season ticket at one of Bucharest‘s teams. Then one day we realised we were watching a load of old shit and haven’t been back since – the visit of Chelsea to Cluj two years ago excepted. And even that was bloody awful).
Anyway, yesterday morning he bought a Romanian sports newspaper. One that was published in… 3D.
We took a look.
Now. For those of you who have yet to experience the publishing phenomenon that is the 3D newspaper, we can best describe it as… well… as a newspaper with blurred photos.
Or at least that’s what we thought.
For when you put on your free cardboard 3D-specs, a simple newspaper with blurred photos is miraculously transformed into… a simple newspaper with blurred photos that you are reading while wearing cardboard 3D-specs.
The future of publishing it is not.
We wish 3D newspapers a quick and painless death.
As it happens, we will be firmly on the side of Romanian football this week when Steaua travel to England to play Liverpool in the bloated, rebranded UEFA Cup/Europa League, another competition Romanians apparently have yet to realise is useless and means bugger all.